Thursday, December 25, 2008
Merry Christmas
This is our 5th Christmas apart. I had done pretty well until this year in providing our kids with a half way decent Christmas. I was layed off December 5 with now warning, I had less than 500 dollars to get the bills paid and food. I know God gives me what I need but sometimes it would be nice to have something more just in case this is the month they foreclose on the house. I felt like such a loser these past weeks knowing I had nothing to give our kids. And to top it all off the same day I was let go I had a doctors appt. that did not go well, I will be having surgery yet again for a hernia and they are going to do a biopsy on my liver. My doctor wants me to start doing treatment for the Hep C after the surgery she says it has to be done before my liver gets much worse. What a year what a month. I have had 14 viles of blood taken in this past week, an ultra sound , cat scan. I don't know how I will pay for all this but it needs to be taken care of. The funny thing is I knew I was in need of another hernia surgery but if I had not gotten laid off I would have just let it go, I was in constant pain (still am) but I was getting a decent pay check. Now I have nothing. My Christmas wish is for you to be here holding me while I go through this mess. I pray every night and wait for the court to decide if we can be a family again. I need you here and our kids need you here. I know how lonely you feel down there by yourself during the holidays, I am sorry you are alone. I wish you were here. I am going to pray tonight that you will be here for our next Christmas. I love you and miss you so much!
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